Blood at My Fingertips
It’s true isn't it? Writing is laying our inner most
thoughts out for the world to be influenced by and for us to be criticized
with. It is gutting ourselves with a dull blade and as the need and want
becomes more we push harder and harder to form our blood into words. It’s
funny and head turning that this is so empowering.
“The Goody-Two-Shoes Nature” says
writing practice is “like any other sport.” So why then does it suggest
we walk away when it becomes difficult? Any person who dreams of writing
writes with their whole heart. A bad day of writing is simply just
that. An athlete who has a bad day does not have the option to not step
on that field. They are dedicated to their sport. They do what
needs to be done to get through the practice or the game they barely had the
effort to attend. Does that mean their “heart isn’t into it?”
Absolutely not! It just means we as writers and athletes alike are human
and we all have days we need to push through life’s difficulties to do what our
heart desires. It was Stephen King in "On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft" who said “Stopping a piece of work
just because it’s hard either emotionally or imaginatively is a bad idea.
Sometimes you have to go on when you don’t feel like it and sometimes you’re
doing good work when it feels like all you’re managing to do is shovel shit
from a sitting position.”
We are not all so fortunate to have the option to “rest completely
for a while” and “come back more fully choosing to engage.” There are
deadlines in writing which are our game days. So having a routine for
writing practice doesn’t make us being “dutiful.” It makes us being whole
heartedly dedicated to our sport of writing. We will take our much needed
break during our off season and heal from our injuries and strains then.
But until that day comes we will step on that field, walk into that gym, sit
down with pens in our hands or finger tips at our keys and we will push through
any wall that tries to block us. When game day comes, some athletes throw
up before their performance, I scream before writing. You have no idea
how many times I screamed when writing this. But I finished and you are reading
it. I poured my blood into every one of these words.
